Mind, Body, Spirit

I am concerned that this blog would start to come off as a diet blog or even worse...a new years resolution blog because of all the talk of vegetables and dropping inches.

I thought I'd take a moment here to clarify my thinking. This is not either of the above. My 'body enlightenment' journey is not about loosing weight at all actually. I am loosing weight and getting 'in shape' but that's the side effect of what I am doing.

The body issue has been a life long issue for me. I started Weight Watchers at age 8 and it went from there....diet after diet. I beat myself up for about 25 yrs. At age 8 I would literally punch myself in the face and scream "you're fat!" "you're ugly!" "I hate you!" I thought I had to be thin to be lovable. Throughout my teens I starved myself for as much as 2 weeks at a time. Then I binged. In my 20s I added in some drinking with the binging. Even at my thinnest moments I thought I was disgusting. I was depressed for about 14 yrs. I fell into the trap of waiting for tomorrow to come to live......"when I am thin then I can...." These are just some of the 'highlights' of a long long list of self abuses. (all ancient history now)

At age 31 (7 yrs ago) I started Overeaters Anonymous. This was the beginning of my enlightenment though I didn't know it yet. It was with the help of a dedicated sponsor that I wrote and spoke my way to the realisation that this body issue was really a head issue. I stayed with OA for a full year and it really got my head going in the right direction. From there many changes took place....I began composting, gardening, MOVING, raising chickens, canning, etc etc etc. What does this have to do with my body??? Well- everything actually. It was a beginning of consciousness. I saw that my thinking was effecting every aspect of my life and with every little step I took another idea fell into place. With each idea came more knowledge and so on. With my hands in the dirt I found my way back to my Faith. (Since OA I have lost a little over 100 lbs.)

Now- here I am. My head is on pretty darn straight and I am living in alignment with my spiritual beliefs. But, I am still carrying the physical baggage from my old hurts. This stuff is not who I am and has absolutely nothing to do with me today. Hence, my 'body enlightenment' is me creating my body to match my mind and spirit. Yes, I will loose more weight but I have already shed the emotional weight that was holding me back--- the shrinking butt is just a perk ;)

Our bodies are sacred vessels that contain all our potential, all our futures so we must be mindful to nurture and nourish them. This is our spiritual practice that will help us to lead a full and active life.